Updated: Jun 6, 2019
Where does your mind go when you think of “Intimacy”?
Discomfort? Escape? Excitement?
Slow kisses. Fingers interlaced. Skin on skin.
Do you think of savouring the experience?
Being in nature. Reading a book. The aroma of fresh coffee. Indulging your senses.
Perhaps you experience this as detachment, conquest or power?
Avoiding feeling your emotions. Needing to control. Not wanting to be truly be seen.
The more I lean into “Intimacy” the more comfortable I feel within myself to write about it.
I respect that for some, this topic may feel a little taboo or uncomfortable.
We all have unique blueprints of how we perceive certain words.
We attach meaning to them from our experiences, beliefs, memories and values.
There was a time that saying the word “sex” would make me feel uncomfortable.
One of my roles was “the good girl“ and I played to that role - big time.
I was educated that speaking about this topic was not wholesome or appropriate.
Doing the best I could with what I knew at the time - I placed “intimacy” into this category too.
And so my journey as the “Dormant Lover” and “Distorted Lover” archetypes unfolded in my life.
All the while, I felt that I was hiding part of myself.
I had attached so much shame to my perception of “Intimacy”.
The thing about personal growth - if you choose to take yourself on - is it will STRETCH you.
But only if you are ready and willing to face off with parts of yourself that aren’t easy to shine a light on.
Essentially, to make the invisible, visible.
To push the envelope a little by not conforming to expectations that feed the addiction of what is safe, appropriate and comfortable - if it’s having a negative impact on your life.
This is what has come through for me today to share with you: Embodiment and integration.
Let’s roll with this Archetypes theme so this lands.
The “Embodied Lover” Archetype.
The following concept and notes are lessons I have learned from the beautiful MLB in 2018.
The Embodied Lover has the ability to stand back in her power and hold space powerfully.
She knows people get to run off and learn their lessons.
She knows people get to go through their growing pains.
They get to make their own decisions.
She’ll hold to being that strong, safe and compassionate space.
AND when people need to they can come back to her and be held in her embrace.
There is no judgement.
There is patience and trust.
The most effective coaches are able to step into this energy and hold this space.
Their job is to stand there and be a beacon of love for clients, knowing they don’t have to do the work for them.
It’s a disservice to people to try and do the work for them, to change their minds, to tell them what’s right and wrong.
They allow people their journey from an unconditional loving space.
They just want people to grow and succeed.
Trusting Oneself And The Other
If you are ready and eager to understand the beautiful nature of Intimacy on this level, I highly recommend reading Intimacy - Trusting Oneself and The Other by Osho.
My entire ethos of LOVE and that love is the stepping stone to freedom was activated after reading this book.
This book gets INTIMATE in exploring words we all throw around without fully understanding how we use those words and what we are making them mean.
If any of this vibes with you - I also invite you to reach in and connect.
You can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, just search Jo Kathleen Marie.
Or flick me an email if you'd like to explore this further on a call email@example.com
Keep checking in as i'll be releasing more blogs on Real Talk, Personal Development, Mental Health, Wellbeing and Resilience.
Before I go - Remember that you are not alone and that collectively we are powerful!